The dialysis journey continues....

Since my first visit to the low-clearance/pre-dialysis clinic back in September not much has occurred.  We've written off to the ESA monkeys but obviously haven't heard anything yet so financially things are still up sh*t creek.  We haven't heard from the community nurses, or the builder or anyone else really.  I've been cracking on with the diet thing and trying to get myself organised.

During the past week I've had 2 more visits to MRI.

Monday we went off to Suite D of outpatients to yet another department, that of  the Vascular variety. After having a couple of MRSA swabs taken I saw the doctor, who's name I can't remember.  After ascertaining that I am right handed she positioned my left arm on a pillow on her knee and proceeded to scan the underside of my upper arm.  It was a bit like an ultrasound machine and very similar to the scans I have done regularly of my heart.  It was all going swimmingly and I was enjoying watching the scan on screen when she changed tack and decided to scan the lower half of my arm and for this she put a tournequette at the very top of my arm, and she fastened it very tight, and I mean VERY tight.  For the next 10-ish minutes, although it felt a lot longer, I sat there feeling like my arm was going to burst and I didn't dare look down at it as my squeem levels would have gone screaming off the radar!
Eventually she was done.  It transpires that I have great arteries (woohoo) but rubbish veins (boooo) and siting the fistula at my elbow isn't an option so it will be sited on the inner edge of my wrist.  Great.  But then she said me being sedated for the procedure woudn't be an option as sedation, she seemed to think, was as bad as a general for someone with my problems.  Fabulous.  So now I do have to be awake for it.  Instant panic.
I came away from the appointment feeling despondent, fed-up and waorrying yet again about the whole thing.  It was a bit of a teary evening but eventually I stopped feeling sorry for myself.

On Friday we were back at MRI in the pouring rain by 8.30 in the morning, managed to park on the street outside the hospital.  I was feeling a bit iffy today which the blood-taking nurse noticed when I went in for my arm-full of blood to be taken.  She seemed a bit concerned so put my file to the top and I was straight in to see the consultant.  The tablets to stop the leg tremors are giving me nightmares so stop taking them and she'll get the GP to put me on something else.  The phospate blockers are causing an upset stomach so stop taking those.  I told her my worries about the fistula procedure to Dr Hirst and she said I could see the clinical psycologist who would be able to teach me some 'coping stategies' (I bet he can't!) so I said 'Yes please!'

We talked about transplant again but she was unaware whether the transplant co-ordinator had written to or heard back from my cardiologist but once they had, then I would be referred to the transplant start-up clinic.  So many bloomin departments and clinics and specialists, its a bit mind-boggling!

Then in to see the dietician; a different one to last time.  This one confused me greatly bu saying as my kidneys were filtering potassium ok at the moment I could eat items in the red column, as long as I didn't have all of them all the time kinda-thing.  Then she said although 'corn based snacks' were in the green column (green for yayy) I must only ever have them as a treat, say once a month - confusing.  And it is important that I stick to the 1/2 pint of milk allowance a day, as protein is baaaad.  I mentioned I sometimes felt sick in the mornings so was advised to have a carbohydrate snack before going to bed - such as a couple of plain biscuits, 2 slices of toast, crumpets, croissants.

From there we went in and saw Krisha again, one of the pre-dialysis nurses, who was purely there incase we had any questions, which we didn't so then it was home.

I didn't feel as positive about it all this time when I got in, I felt quite confused.
Anyway, half an hour later the post arrived and there was my appointment for my fistula procedure.  Thursday 18th December.  One week before Christmas.  Shit.